Ep 7 - Cravings Explained: 3 Stories That Help People Understand Addiction

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Episode Title: "Cravings Explained: 3 Stories That Help People Understand Addiction."

Have you ever felt judged by someone who says, “Just stop drinking,” or “If you loved me, you would quit”? If so, this episode is for you—and for the people in your life who just don’t seem to get it.

In this heartfelt and eye-opening episode of Sobriety Now What?, host Stuart Cline—master’s level addictions counselor and success coach with over 25 years of experience—shares three powerful stories that bring the emotional and physical intensity of addiction and cravings to life.

Whether you're newly sober, a seasoned traveler on the path of recovery, or someone who loves a person in recovery, these stories offer fresh language and metaphors to foster empathy, reduce judgment, and strengthen connection. You’ll hear:

• Beers and Bikinis – a story that uses relatable temptation to help loved ones understand what it’s like to face cravings at home.
• Living on the Edge – an evocative metaphor comparing cravings to unresolved passion, capturing the physical tension many experience.
• Stop the Sneeze – a universal and sensory metaphor to show just how uncontrollable and consuming cravings can feel.

These stories aren’t just informative—they’re transformative. They’re meant to be shared with the people in your life who need a new way to understand addiction.

🎧 Takeaway & Action Step: Pick one story and share it with someone close to you. See how it opens the door to deeper compassion and support.

Whether you're staying sober for a day, a week, or a lifetime, you're not alone—and your experience matters.

Let me know if you’d like a shorter version for Instagram or social media captions too!

Invitation to consider at least one helpful piece of information to help them thrive in their sobriety and to share with podcast with others and to follow and email questions. 

Transcript

E7 Cravings Explained: 3 Stories That Help People Understand Addiction. 

[00:00:00] Have you ever been frustrated when someone says, if you loved me, you would stop, or It's all in your head, or, I can stop using? Why can't you? In your mind, you might be sarcastically thinking, oh, let's just do that, that little nugget. Why didn't I think of that? If you heard any of these misinformed comments and want to come back, that will help them understand why stopping is not that easy.

Then you are in the right place. In this episode, you will learn three stories that you can use to respond to help people understand the challenge of addiction and recovery and why it's not as simple as just stop. Welcome to Sobriety Now what? The podcast to help you thrive in your sobriety. Hi, I'm your host Stuart Klein, a master's level addictions counselor, mental health counselor, success coach.

With over 25 years of experience helping thousands of people navigate the [00:01:00] challenges of sober life, we're going to tackle a question that comes up for me a lot in my work. The question is, how do I help my partner or anyone close to me understand what addiction and cravings are like? Many people in recovery struggle with feeling judged or misunderstood by those they love most.

The truth is, unless someone has experienced addiction firsthand, it can be hard to understand or get it. Logic alone often doesn't bridge that gap, but stories do. In today's episode, I'll share three stories that you can use to help explain addiction and cravings in a way that connects on a human and emotional level.

Stories for adults, and one for all ages. I've seen these metaphors. Open eyes and open hearts. Let's dive in. Story one. Beers and bikinis. This is about temptation and cravings. This story comes from [00:02:00] a 30-year-old woman. We will call Joan. She came into my office because she was arrested for drinking and driving.

Joan was having a hard time stopping drinking. She told me that she and her husband had a nightly ritual. After work, they would each drink a six pack of beer together, and those were the light days. When she got arrested, it scared her straight and she stopped drinking. However, her husband did not. He continued bringing their favorite beers into their home every night, drinking in front of her.

While she tried to hold her sobriety together, she was struggling, cravings were getting ahold of her. She sat on my couch one afternoon and said, I need help staying sober, and I do not know what to do with my husband. I have asked him not to bring alcohol into the house because it's so hard for me to stop.

He tells me I am the one with the problem and he's not stopping. I'm not asking him to stop drinking, but I just can't have it in the house. If I slip up, I could go [00:03:00] to jail and I don't trust myself. I asked her, have you ever tried to help him understand by re relating it to something he can feel? She had not.

I told her this story and she passed it along to her husband that night. Joan sat him down and said. Imagine if I invited six exotic dancers, all beautiful, all flirty to live in our home, and every night they're lounging around in bikinis, being touchy, feely, and flirty with you. Meanwhile, you've promised to stay committed to me.

Do you think at some point you may make a bad decision? Do you think it would mess with your head a bit? Her husband sat with her for this moment and finally said. Yeah, I'd probably have a hard time too. She shared that beers and bikinis are not a good combination to have in this house. He was not sold about the bikini idea, but that was the moment something clicked for [00:04:00] him.

He had a better understanding of how hard those beers could be to resist by imagining his own temptations. This started a bigger discussion and he made some changes that she could work with. I love this story because it allows her partner to relate to this on a primal emotional level. Addiction isn't just about self-control.

It's about rewiring years of habits and emotional ties, and when we frame it like this, others start to feel the struggle, the tension and frustration. Now, having alcohol in the house is not a struggle for everyone, but it was for Joan, that story was beers and bikinis. Feel free to pass it along to someone you feel it could help.

Here's my next story story. Two, living on the edge. To fully grasp the physical tension of a craving, I often use this next metaphor. Imagine you're walking hand in hand with your partner on a Hawaiian beach, [00:05:00] hearing the waves crashing in the background, feeling the warm sun, smelling the salty air, seeing a dormant volcano in the distance, feeling totally connected in paradise without a care in the world.

Later you return to your villa and things heat up between you two romantic candles. Roses passion building to the point it would make Cupid blush clothes start flying off. You're connecting to the volcanic powers of the island and feeling that your own volcano is about to burst, and just as you're about to reach that ultimate release.

Your partner stops abruptly and says, stop. Um huh. And leaves the room. Imagine what that would feel like for you. The unresolved wound up tension you feel at that moment. The irritation, the let down, the wanting, the strong desire that you want to release, but you can't. That's what a craving is like The release [00:06:00] is right there, but unreachable.

And now imagine this miserable feeling lasting not for just seconds, but for minutes, hours, or days. That's what many people in early recovery go through. I. The feeling of a craving is like trying to feed a hungry ghost that will never feel satiated or satisfied. No matter how much you feed it. It still wants more.

It's never enough. This powerful metaphor helps people experience a craving on an emotional level to help them get it. I encourage you to check out and listen to a song that helps people understand this intensity. The singer is Meatloaf the song Paradise By the Dashboard Light. It perfectly captures the building tension of that experience.

Let me know if you agree or not in the comments, friends and family members who've never experienced addiction. Understand [00:07:00] cravings better when they recall a time of intense desire being blocked, whether it's passion, hunger, or relief. Everyone knows the discomfort of almost, but not quite. Alright, let's move on to story number three.

Stop that sneeze. Imagine the feeling right before a sneeze. It's a strange and powerful mix of anticipation and tension. It's like your whole face and body are winding up for something inevitable. There's a tingling or a prickling sensation usually deep in your nose or the back of your throat that builds and builds almost like pressure rising inside a balloon.

Your eyes might squint, your breath pauses and your body braces itself. It's a split second of suspense, but that split second can last minutes or hours for people who have cravings. How well would you do not to give into [00:08:00] a sneeze? That is what it can feel like with a craving and why addiction does not make sense to people who just don't get it.

This is why when someone says, I can stop, just stop. It's not helpful. There's a reason why peer support groups, counselors, doctors, treatment centers, are out there to help people because no one teaches you this in school. The tools teachers teach in school do not come close to helping people cope with living with the sensation day in and day out.

This is why people take sobriety one day at a time because that is manageable. We can do a day and if we can't, we do an hour or a minute. But the idea of never getting that release for the rest of our lives. It's more than what we can bear sometimes, and we just need to break it down in smaller and smaller increments so we can get through the next one and know that this sensation will pass.

Cravings are time [00:09:00] sensitive, and if we stay busy and preoccupy ourselves and stop thinking about it, the craving goes away faster. My hope for those of you who do not understand addiction and may be listening now. Have a little more respect, compassion, and understanding to what some people in recovery are going through each day.

Even though the sneeze metaphor is one that I think anyone can relate to, I believe it is a powerful story to tell. I found this metaphor works for almost anyone, whether it's your spouse, family, or friends, because everyone's had a sneeze. If you really want to make this a real experience for people without having to even tell the story, get some black pepper, the kind you have at SE for seasoning at home or restaurants.

Have the person you are explaining this, inhale some black pepper through their nose and have them try not to sneeze. That could start a very interesting discussion and one that could help people [00:10:00] have more empathy and compassion to the field of addiction and recovery. So today we explore three different ways to explain addiction and cravings, each story helps explain that addiction isn't just about willpower, it's about complex emotional, physical, and neurological processes. As we wrap up today's episode of Sobriety, now what, let's highlight some takeaways from what you just heard. I. You just heard stories designed to help you explain addiction and cravings to loved ones who may not fully understand your experience.

We talked about beers and bikinis and how cravings can feel like the beers in the fridge are flirting with you. Or the second story called Living on the Edge, like being stuck at the peak of passion without release. And the third story, stop the sneeze. Showing how a craving can feel like needing to sneeze, but never being able to.

These stories show us that cravings and addiction [00:11:00] are based on feelings that often defy logic. Their emotional, physical, and deeply ingrained experiences. The takeaway today is that by using relatable feeling based metaphors, you can help those around you grasp just how challenging sobriety can be and reducing judgment while building support and compassion.

Here's your action step. Think about someone in your life who might benefit from hearing one of these stories. Choose one that feels most relevant to your situation and share it with them. Then reflect on how it feels to communicate your needs in a whole new way. Or just send them over to this podcast sobriety now what?

And have them listen and discuss before we go. I'd love to hear from you. I would love to know if you relate to these stories or do you have a story of your own that has helped someone get it? I really appreciate all that you're doing today to stay sober. I know it can be hard, but it's worth it and it gets better.[00:12:00] 

Just remember from the wise philosopher when you, the Poh, you're braver than you believe. Stronger than you Seem, smarter than you think, and more loved than you will ever know. Thank you for listening. Until next time, be kind to yourself and be well. Enjoy. I.